Mandy is absolutely triggered by Twitter’s possible takeover by Elon Musk. She attends a Twitter-sponsored therapy session to help her cope.
Watch this short video clip* where Mandy tells her Twitter supervisor of her plight. Below is the full transcript:
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Young Twitter Employee: Dr. Paulin, I’m your two o’clock.
Twitter Manager: Oh, hey Mandy, uh have a seat. What can I do for you?
Young Twitter Employee: It’s terrible, I can’t even, I have literally lost my ability to even…
Twitter Manager: Well let’s calm down. What was it? Some sort of tragic loss? Death in the family? No, no one misgendered you did they?
Young Twitter Employee: No. It’s even worse. Elon Musk wants to buy our company.
Twitter Manager: [Under his breath] All right not another one. All right, just tell me: What is it about Elon buying Twitter that actually bothers you? And remember, this is a safe space, There’s no judgment here.
Young Twitter Employee: If he buys our free speech platform, people will be able to have free speech on our platform.
Twitter Manager: Well that’s just stupid. All right, let’s get to the bottom of this, let’s go a little bit deeper. What exactly bothers you about somebody having free speech on our free speech platform?
Young Twitter Employee: If we don’t have the unilateral power to ban ideas we don’t like, we’d actually have to discuss and defend our ideas based on their own merit
Twitter Manager: And what’s the problem with that?
Young Twitter Employee: It’s just everyone who disagrees with me is a Nazi, so it’s imperative that I change their mind with force and violence.
Twitter Manager: Very interesting. Let’s, let’s try something else. I’m gonna hold up some shapes, and I want you to tell me exactly what you see [Twitter Manager holds up some images that resemble Rorschach Test ink blots].
Young Twitter Employee: Nazis, Nazis, Nazis. And that one kind of looks like a lip. Nazis, Nazis, Adolf Hitler, Nazis. Oh I know that one. It’s the Hindu symbol for peace. Namaste. Nazis, Nazis, Donald Trump. No wait, it’s still Nazis.
Twitter Manager: Fascinating. Now I’m gonna ask you a question. I want you to answer honestly. Is Elon in the room with us Right now?
Young Twitter Employee: Yes. I see him at work. See him at Whole Foods, I see him when I get into my Tesla. He’s everywhere. [Music] [She now screams and runs out of the room].
Twitter Manager: Alright. Whatever. Next.
Second Young Twitter Employee: Hey Doc:
Twitter Manager: What?
Second Young Twitter Employee: Why do you have these pictures of my mom?
End of story! In the final twenty-three seconds of the clip, a narrator makes a friendly pitch asking the viewers to subscribe to The Babylon Bee YouTube Channel.
*Video credit: The Babylon Bee YouTube channel (Satire site)
The sad part is that THAT is pretty close to reality. Afterall, if you don’t allow yourself to be bullied by lefty goofballs then YOU are a Nazi.